“Radioactive” And 4 More Songs To Add To Your Gaming And/Or Sex Playlist
Hey guys, Harry from the Enabler here. If there are two things I was put into this world for, it’s video games and sex. After […]
music
Brendon Urie Files For Divorce From Brendon Urie
LOS ANGELES— Brendon Urie, lead singer and only remaining member of the former pop-rock band Panic! At The Disco, has announced that he will be […]
Nerds Take Over Covel Piano
COVEL COMMONS— The hearts, souls, and especially ears of residents of The Hill are being terrorized by the sounds emanating from the Covel Piano. “I […]
The Westwood Enabler’s 2022 Favorites
Inspired by Obama’s list of his 2022 favs, below is a comprehensive list of what us cool people were watching, reading, and listening to this […]
Spotify Wrapped 2022 Just Spotify Wrapped 2021 In Slightly Different Order
WESTWOOD — As the year comes to an end, Spotify has once again given each user a personalized playlist consisting of their most listened songs […]
Report: Your Neighbor Only Practices Trombone Because He Hates You
WESTWOOD — After careful consideration of the evidence, we’re certain that your neighbor- the one saved in your phone as “Angus from Apartment 216”- only […]
New Documentary Reveals Existence Of Secret Fourth Beatle
LIVERPOOL — In stunning never-before-seen footage, the new documentary “The Beatles: Get Back” appears to suggest the existence of a previously unknown fourth member of […]
Area Man Enters Hour Three of Describing Music Taste
WESTWOOD — Third-year film student Doug Babcock has been filibustering a real conversation for three hours now, after an acquaintance made the mistake of asking […]
Number of Acapella Groups Reaches Triple Digits
WESTWOOD — Local UCLA officials reported today that the number of campus acapella groups has reached triple digits, and shows no sign of slowing down. […]
Ethnomusicology Student Caught Listening To Maroon 5 On Spotify
WESTWOOD — Third-year ethnomusicology major Sebastian Arrow-Gantz lost his musical authority Monday morning when his Spotify listening activity revealed that he was playing Maroon 5 […]