Studies Show That A Hoe Does In Fact Get Cold

WESTWOOD — Leading researchers for UCLA’s Thotical Research Lab have published a groundbreaking report suggesting that a hoe does, in fact, get cold. “It dropped to only 55° when I was walking home last night and I actually felt pretty chilly!” said Research Subject 69, whose warmest item of clothing is a leather jacket. “I’m cold, but at the same time, I’m grateful for the free accessorizing this weather has brought – my hard nipples really bring the fit together.” At press time, hoes everywhere were doubling up on fishnets to combat the frigid weather.

About Gillian Smith 50 Articles
Flavius Octavius Julius Gaius Septimius, known colloquially as "Gillian the Great," is the 71st emperor of Rome. Her notable achievements include winning the 2021 Maryland BOGGLE state championship and not being assassinated yet.