
WESTWOOD — Leading researchers for UCLA’s Thotical Research Lab have published a groundbreaking report suggesting that a hoe does, in fact, get cold. “It dropped to only 55° when I was walking home last night and I actually felt pretty chilly!” said Research Subject 69, whose warmest item of clothing is a leather jacket. “I’m cold, but at the same time, I’m grateful for the free accessorizing this weather has brought – my hard nipples really bring the fit together.” At press time, hoes everywhere were doubling up on fishnets to combat the frigid weather.