Student Fails Midterm Election

Park's failure to vote correctly is expected to have grave repercussions on her peer's opinions of her.
Park’s failure to vote correctly is expected to have grave effects on her peer’s opinions of her.

WESTWOOD—Noting a severe lack of knowledge in local politics as well as a preoccupation with school work, second year Hannah Park admitted to having completely and utterly wasted her ballot in California’s state election this morning. “Sadly, none of the candidates or propositions I voted for even begin to approach what a majority of Americans would consider acceptable,” stated Park, who clearly hasn’t done the research required to represent the will of a nation over the past several weeks. “Sometimes I think it would’ve been better if I had pretended I was too sick to vote, but then I remember that democracy is one of the most fundamental rights afforded to citizens of this country. Who am I then to silence my own voice?” Park, after doing some research on her phone, later went on to say: “Shit, so that’s what prop 47 was about?”❖

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