Second Year Learns To Do Laundry

WESTWOOD — Rieber Hall residents can now breathe a sigh of relief as second-year resident Emmet Turring (no relation) has finally learned to do his laundry. “Usually, when I need clean clothes, I just yell ‘Mom,’ but thanks to this neat little life hack, I no longer have to do that,” said Turring, who is such a dirty boy. “I always thought clothes just got clean through magic or something, but it turns out anyone can use these. I really wish more people knew about this.” At press time, Turing was showing off a Hot Pocket that he finally figured out how to microwave.

About Robi Chatterjee 12 Articles
Robi Chatterjee writes stuff, but not bios. Writing bios is lame. Also it's pronounced "Row-B" not "Raw-B".