TAMPA — Reporters on the scene at Florida’s Middle District Federal court, where Judge Kathryn Kimball Mizelle recently struck down the mask mandate for public transportation, are claiming that the Judge’s beautiful smile may have affected her decision. “Her teeth were so white I had to wear shades in the courtroom,” said Westwood Enabler correspondent Penelope Penderbottom, whose mouth and nose look just okay. “At first I was like, ‘why would she say it’s unlawful to have a mask mandate when we’ve had them for years.’ Then she took off her mask. It would be a crime to cover up that smile.” At press time, Kimball Mizelle was seen lighting up a room.
About Jade Lacy 46 Articles
Jade is an enigma, the shadow at the edge of your vision, the personification of night, and a fourth-year English major and Asian American Studies Minor. She enjoys creeping into your nightmares and creative writing.