Professor Emails Syllabus To See Which Nerds Respond

Professor Ma plans on grading the class on a reverse curve “to take these squares down a notch.”

WESTWOOD—Professor Alondra Ma emailed a copy of the syllabus to her chemistry students instead of presenting it in class so she could note which nerds responded. “It’s always tricky to spot the nerds in a 400 person lecture hall. Front row politics just don’t apply when it’s so hard to find a seat,” Ma said while blocking the email addresses of every student who replied to her. “I did write in the email that each of them should respond so I know they’ve received my correspondence, but the only people who actually do that are absolute kiss-ass dorks, and I don’t want to associate with them.” At press time, Ma was waiting to give a noogie to anyone who came to her weekly office hours.

About Sierra Scott 24 Articles
Sierra is an accomplished writer who has been with the Westwood Enabler for as long as many can remember. Years? No. Decades? No. The ancient Mesopotamians referred to her as "Shalduth, the Night Bringer" but she usually goes by "Sierra."