New Sheriff Realizes He In Wrong Town

GREENWOOD, MISSISSIPPI—Upon reporting for duty on his first day at work and proclaiming “there’s a new sheriff in town,” recently-relocated law enforcement officer Darryl Sharpton was informed that he had accidentally arrived in the wrong town, apparently confusing Greenwood with Greenville, South Carolina. “I was very perplexed when I was apprehending a speeding driver and another sheriff pulled up and dramatically asserted that he was the new sheriff in town,” said Greenwood Sheriff Jedediah Haines, who has served in that role for the past 20 years and had to correct Sharpton after his cinematic proclamation. “I told him that this town ain’t big enough for the two of us, then noticed a brand-new Greenville Sheriff’s badge adorned his uniform. I immediately knew that he had mixed up the two towns and we resolved the issue fairly quickly. It’s an easy mistake to make.” Due to the blunder, Sheriff Sharpton was robbed of his proud moment as The Greenville News had already announced the new sheriff in the Sunday morning paper.

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