UNITED STATES—In light of the Supreme Court’s historic decision legalizing same-sex marriage, citizens across the Nation turned to their gay friend via Facebook message today to congratulate them. “We are all so happy for our gay friend. They have gone through so much and deserve to be treated equally,” said the Nation, noting that although they haven’t seen their gay friend in a while, they still think about them sometimes and are pretty sure they’re still gay. “It is because of our gay friend that we decided to support same-sex marriage in the first place. That makes this day especially meaningful to us. We love our gay friend so much!!” Although at press time, the friend has yet to respond, The Nation plans to send another message asking for details about the upcoming pride parade soon. ❖
