AUSTIN — After a joke asking the woke mob to ‘DEI these nutz’, unfunny comedian Matt Rifle felt the beans in his wrinkly scrotum swell up to the size of grapefruits. “Every time I get pushback for making domestic violence jokes, my balls reach further down into the special place in hell I belong,” said Rifle as his sack swung to and fro like an inflatable man outside a car dealership. “Shit, my balls are almost as ratchet as this busted shawty right here in the front row. Women amirite?” At press time, Rifle’s testicles sent out a Notes app apology.
