Jealous LA Metro To Debut Bigger, Bluer Bus

LOS ANGELES – In a move described as “childish” and an “unjustifiable use of public funds,” the LA Metro announced late Friday night it would be debuting a bigger, bluer bus than Santa Monica’s Big Blue Bus. “The Big Blue Bus can suck my Big Blue Cock,” declared @metrolosangeles on its Instagram Close Friends story. “That Big Blue Bitch has been spending a little too much time ‘collaborating’ with Culver CityBus. I bet Culver CityBus is going to want to make some connections with me after it sees how blue and girthy my bus is.” At press time, the purple line extension to Westwood had been delayed again.

About Gabe McNeill 16 Articles
Known primarily for his roles in the Watergate break-in and the breakup of The Beatles, Gabe McNeill was inspired to write for The Enabler after the Daily Bruin fired him.