“He Doesn’t Bite,” Says Man About Dog Who Stabs People

CORNER BY CHICK-FIL-A — Area man Brad Perez confirmed this week that while his dog Brutus does not bite people, he does stab them. “Of course he doesn’t bite. How could he when he has that big-ass knife between his teeth?” said Perez, who originally gave Brutus the blade to keep him from biting everyone he saw. “You will still get rabies if he stabs you, though.” At press time, this Enabler reporter was getting stabbed.

About Ammi Lane-Volz 18 Articles
Ammi Lane-Volz has a rock in their shoe. Hey, guys, wait-- guys, stop walking so they can get this rock out of their shoe.