Haunted House On The Hill Just Classic Triple Inhabited By Three Men

WESTWOOD— In a whirlwind of festivity, the UCLA On-Campus Housing Council has decided to celebrate the spooky holiday season with their very own haunted house on The Hill: a Classic Triple inhabited by three men. “I didn’t expect it to be this terrifying,” said first-year Morgan Flabbergast, who left the haunted house infected with tetanus, chlamydia, or both. “The unwashed basketball shorts dangling from the bed posts and mysterious web-like substances splattered across the ceiling really added to the horror.” At press time, paramedics were called as students had collapsed from overexposure to Axe Body Spray.