WESTWOOD—Sources report that freshman Brian Clements has finished up curating his sex playlist consisting solely of songs by popular R&B artist, The Weeknd. “He has really been trying hard to craft an impeccable playlist that is both soft enough to elucidate the feeling of intimacy but also invigorating enough for passionate copulation,” said floormate James, who demonstrated with his hands the crescendo that Clements hoped to build into an immaculate denouement. “I think The Weeknd just has such a great discography and such a wide variety of songs which hit various sensual themes, any song of his would set the mood well.” At press time, the new playlist as well as its previous iterations had garnered a single play that sources report was Clements showing it to his roommates during move in week.