Feminist Win! Orgasm Gap Closed By Sex Where No One Cums

LOS ANGELES — On Tuesday night, Jenny and Rick pioneered a brave new approach to closing the orgasm gap by having equally unsatisfying sex. “Studies have shown that straight men orgasm 95% of the time during intercourse, while straight women do only 65% of the time. My solution? Sex where nobody — and I mean nobody — cums,” said Rick as he requested to be paid 78 cents to the male dollar. “If she’s not coming, I’m not coming. Simple as that.” At press time, Rick stood in solidarity with women everywhere by learning how to fake an orgasm as well as to qualify his well-informed opinions with the phrase “if that even makes sense?”

About Tatiana Davidson 19 Articles
Putin's second least favorite Jewish comedian.