WESTWOOD — In an attempt to rebrand as a skinny queen, Fat Sal’s is saying bye-bye to grease and hello to semaglutide in its famous sandwiches. “New year, New me! What better way to do that than to serve our food with some extra Ozempic needles I stole from my last doctor’s appointment?” said Fat Sal while showing off his jaw-dropping hourglass figure amidst backed-up traffic on Gayley Avenue. “Our restaurant is at the crossroads of Bel Air, Brentwood, and Beverly Hills — we need food that’s just as hot as our customers. Our clientele will now serve and be served!” At press time, Fat Sal was legally changing his name to Snatched Sal.