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Exhausted Dominatrix Hits The Sack

January 9, 2023 Elena Whitlock Culture, Graphics, Health, Life, News, News In Pictures, Swag 0

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Student Enters Long-Distance Relationship with Hedrick Summit Resident

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Fetishist Senator Gravely Misunderstands U.S.’ Inflation Problem

  • 5 Tips On How To Have A Jew-“ish” Passover Seder

    1. Show up late. “Early” is on time, and “on time” is late? NAH! “On time” is as real as your aunt’s nose, and “late” […]

  • James Charles, Katie Fang, and Carter Kench's Coachella outfits on a backdrop of the Coachella music festival.

    Opinion: Shut The Fuck Up About Coachella

    An open letter to everyone on Instagram who is about to go to Coachella this weekend: SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!! I DO NOT CARE!!! I’m […]

  • UCLA Radio Announces Which Queer-Baiting Bay Area White Girl Has Won The Indie-Off

    526 LANDFAIR — After secretly watching countless carabiner-clad brunettes with nose piercings attend their parties at the Compound backlot, the UCLA Radio Events team has […]

  • “Sensitive Young Man” Walk Interrupted By Campus Tour Guide

    WESTWOOD — Last Thursday, one student’s weekly evening “sensitive young man” walk tragically got interrupted by a campus tour guide. “I was pacing around the […]

  • Health Tip: Swallow Your Zyns

    The great historian Howard Zynn once said, “Dissent is the highest form of patriotism.” Revising the revisionist, I say, “Dis Zyn is the highest form […]

Featured Authors

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Azalea Morris
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  • OPINION: Useless Sproul Laundry Machines Can’t Even Make Me Cum
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Barrett Willet
  • Douchebag Dogwhistle: Avoid Men Who Use The Phrase “Walkable Cities”
  • Local White Boy Makes Big Splash In Intramural Dodgeball Scene
  • Historic UCLA Rugby Hazing Ritual Ruined By Guy Who Just Loves To Drink Piss
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Maggie Kwan
  • Opinion: Shut The Fuck Up About Coachella
  • Bruin Day Tour Group Throws Peanuts At Students
  • J.D. Vance Just Happy To Be Included In Group Chat For Once

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