SALT LAKE CITY, UT — Democrats nationwide breathed a collective sigh of relief Wednesday night after Vice President Pence’s infamous natural charm and charisma appeared to have no bearing on the vice presidential debate. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I pulled that off,” said Senator Kamala Harris after the debate, breathing heavily and mopping sweat off her brow. “He’s so inspiring and suave in person — I kept waiting for him to hit me with one of those devastating Pencian one-liners that make men and women swoon. But I guess he was off his game.” At press time, the fly was still too stunned to be reached for comment after being in such close proximity to the vice president.
About Jay Varhula 23 Articles
The latest in a long line of miners, Jay stumbled upon the Westwood Enabler after accidentally mining through the floor into one of their meetings. In exchange for several precious stones, the Enabler made him editor-in-chief on the spot. Jay's hobbies include: mining for rare stones and metals, singing chanties about the miner's life, and pet photography.