
Religious Scholars Discover Jesus Had a Balayage
VATICAN CITY — On Monday morning, the world’s leading religious scholars announced that Jesus actually had a balayage, contrary to their earlier reports that he […]
VATICAN CITY — On Monday morning, the world’s leading religious scholars announced that Jesus actually had a balayage, contrary to their earlier reports that he […]
SILVER SPRINGS, MD — The recent shooting in Uvalde, TX which left 21 dead has prompted the Food and Drug Administration to grant emergency use […]
UNITED KINGDOM — A new report out of Exeter University claims to have proven that Stonehenge is the only epic thing to ever be done […]
OMAHA — Scientists discovered Thursday that the universe was created 8,000 years ago. “Feel old yet? God, that’s such a long time,” said chief astrophysicist […]
WESTWOOD — A team of UCLA archaeologists announced Monday that, after years of digging, they have uncovered the first woman to ever write “future milf” […]
WESTWOOD — The voices were right, there are bugs under your skin. “The colony of ants under your epidermis has been ignored for far too […]
Following recent news that the Supreme Court will likely overturn Roe v. Wade, we have curated a list of five places to get an abortion […]
MONTREAL — Producers behind the television show “How It’s Made” recently announced that the upcoming season will feature an episode about babies. “The process begins […]
NEW YORK — The world’s leading climate scientists gathered Tuesday to announce the culmination of their prank, known formally as the “Climate Crisis.” “Honestly we […]
TAMPA — Reporters on the scene at Florida’s Middle District Federal court, where Judge Kathryn Kimball Mizelle recently struck down the mask mandate for public […]
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