BREAKING: Gene Block Spotted At Rocco’s

Graphic by Isaiah Little.

WESTWOOD — Esteemed UCLA Chancellor Gene D. Block was spotted at popular Westwood bar Rocco’s this past Thursday night, imbibing and dancing among the Bruin community until the early hours of the morning. “What the fuck is up campus community?! Office hour all night long, baby!” said Block, slurring his words as he guzzled down his third AMF with apparent ease. “I’m the muhhhhhfuhhhh Chancellorrrrrrrrrrr! Charles E. Young got nothing on me bro! Ooooooooooone twoooooo threefourfivesixsevenAYYYYYYYYYET!” At press time, Block was urinating in the garden of the Chancellor’s Residence as the sun began to rise, peering at the half-eaten Fat Jerry laying in the grass several feet away.

About Jack Lyons 79 Articles
Robust and well-rounded, this full-bodied Jack has zesty notes of citrus and pine complemented by an oaky undertone and hints of caramel.