SAN LUIS OBISPO, CA — At 8:36 am PST, Scottie Macadamia compiled a group chat with his peers proposing a weekend trip that will never end up happening. “I basically wanted to take my amigos to a dope campground I used to go to with my dad,” exclaimed Scottie as he bit a string cheese stick in half. “Just hoped the compadres would wanna put on some classic Billy Joel, drive out and kick it with the ultimate babe, mother nature herself.” At press time, Scottie was seen “poking” girls he went to high school with on Facebook.
