UCLA Unveils New Financial Aid Program For Graduation Sashes
WESTWOOD — In an effort to make graduation regalia more accessible for low-income students, the UCLA Financial Aid & Scholarships Office announced a new supplement […]
Articles by Sam Mallari
Student Who Never Went To Class Takes Grad Pics On Campus
WESTWOOD — Amy Allens, fourth-year English student and soon-to-be UCLA alumna, took to Instagram to unveil her array of graduation pictures, poetically taken in front […]
Student Shocked to Find Dumbass at #1 Public University
WESTWOOD — Jaded first-year David Lewis recently concluded that his dream college, which touts itself as the hub of progressive minds and academic advancement, […]
Aww! Man Celebrates Valentine’s Day by Making Love to Capitalism
Johnny Richardson, a 21-year-old Westwood resident, woke up fresh-faced with an extra spring in his step and walked to his local grocery store to ring […]
P: You Should Announce Your Achievements on Social Media / CP: Karen, You’re the Reason Why I’m in Group Therapy
Point: You Should Announce All Your Achievements on Social Media By Karen Paulson There’s no shame in being proud of yourself- it’s called self-esteem. What’s […]
BREAKING: Rain, Shit
WESTWOOD — Contrary to all laws of nature and common sense, it is still raining in Los Angeles. Pamela Hauser, 1st year English major and […]
MISSING: Friend Who Said “We Should Hangout Sometime.”
WESTWOOD — Concerned acquaintances have filed a missing persons report for Allison Nguyen, who was last seen in passing in the dining halls after some […]
Mom Watches Every “The Rock” Film for the Plot
WESTWOOD — Carla Batoots, proud mother of five, has recently caught the attention of film critics nationwide for her staunch defense of every movie starring […]