Kavanaugh Drinks Seventeen Glasses Of Wine To Cope With Investigation Announcement
WASHINGTON, DC — After hearing that FBI will be investigating the sexual assault allegation against him, Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh drank 17 glasses of […]
Month: September 2018
Bill Cosby Nominated To Supreme Court
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a press briefing this morning from Washington, President Donald Trump announced his nomination of popular comedian and actor Bill Cosby to […]
Students Nervously Wonder How CEC Will Fuck It Up This Time
WESTWOOD – Following a well-received announcement that CupCaKKe and Charli XCX will be headlining this year’s BruinBash concert, students at the University of California, Los […]
Student With Den Pass Realizes They’re In For Long Year
WESTWOOD — Area student and Den Pass holder Kayla Parklamindi realized she was in for a long year today when the UCLA football team embarrassingly […]
Roommate Found Online Starting To Show Some Red Flags
SAN DIEGO, CA — After thinking about it some more, incoming freshman Kayla Marker has begun to cast some doubt on her roommate selection choice following […]