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Month: September 2018

Kavanaugh Drinks Seventeen Glasses Of Wine To Cope With Investigation Announcement

September 30, 2018 Brian McReynolds 0

WASHINGTON, DC — After hearing that FBI will be investigating the sexual assault allegation against him, Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh drank 17 glasses of […]

Bill Cosby Nominated To Supreme Court

September 26, 2018 Kylie Kinne 0

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a press briefing this morning from Washington, President Donald Trump announced his nomination of popular comedian and actor Bill Cosby to […]

Students Nervously Wonder How CEC Will Fuck It Up This Time

September 16, 2018 Alex Kukoff 0

WESTWOOD – Following a well-received announcement that CupCaKKe and Charli XCX will be headlining this year’s BruinBash concert, students at the University of California, Los […]

Student With Den Pass Realizes They’re In For Long Year

September 8, 2018 Ross Rosenthal 0

WESTWOOD — Area student and Den Pass holder Kayla Parklamindi realized she was in for a long year today when the UCLA football team embarrassingly […]

Roommate Found Online Starting To Show Some Red Flags

September 3, 2018 Nathan Glovinsky 0

SAN DIEGO, CA — After thinking about it some more, incoming freshman Kayla Marker has begun to cast some doubt on her roommate selection choice following […]

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