Website With Viruses Goes On Juice Cleanse

AboutYourDog prior to its cleanse.

ONLINE—This Thursday the online forum AboutYourDog announced it was going on a juice cleanse. “I’ve just been feeling majorly bloated, and these viruses – yuck!” said the website, who was preparing to spend fifty dollars on five small bottles of juice from Skweez’d. “I’m really hoping these juices will do the trick. The girl behind the counter said pineapple-mint-ginseng-deer-blood is a popular one that should flush something out of my system.” The website was last spotted squinting at a menu and wondering whether tree bark or mulch would be the proper complement for carrot juice.

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About Jessica Waite 41 Articles
Jessica Waite is a 4th year Comparative Literature student who spends more time with her hamster than with other people. Her interests include animals (all), people (few), and social justice (80%).