Report: Strange Things Afoot
BAKERSFIELD — After an increase in sightings of shadowy figures and odd characters, many are beginning to believe that strange things are afoot. “The curse… […]
BAKERSFIELD — After an increase in sightings of shadowy figures and odd characters, many are beginning to believe that strange things are afoot. “The curse… […]
WESTWOOD — As third-year English major Anne Cloyne checked fellow student and love interest Robert Dikk’s Snapchat score for the fifth time in ten minutes, […]
WESTWOOD — Third-year physics major Annabel Brown texted her roommate asking for permission to use her first aid kit Thursday, as she lay bleeding to […]
WASHINGTON D.C. — Seeking to expand on the “No Child Left Behind” educational program, Senate Republicans have rolled out “No Child Left Unshot.” “We think […]
WESTWOOD — Emails leaked this morning revealed that Tucker Carlson has been making pleas for a permanent position at the Daily Bruin. “The woke mob […]
The first thing that struck me, looking up at her, was that she had a kind face. What struck me next was her nerve. “Hi, […]
HOLLYWOOD— According to multiple sources, you reeeaaally did it this time. “Take a cold, hard look at yourself,” said one source familiar with the situation, […]
LOS ANGELES — After a full two and a half months, Sarah Myers has officially returned from “Sarah’s Self-Discovery Journey,” yet she did not seem […]
Yesterday, I was walking back to campus after enjoying a delicious $15 salad at Tendergreens when a homeless man looked right into my eyes and […]
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