Local Family Eats Cornbread Out Of A Turkey’s Ass
LOS ANGELES — The Suelden family will be gathering in their home to eat cornbread out of a turkey’s ass this Thanksgiving, sources confirmed. “Yes, […]
LOS ANGELES — The Suelden family will be gathering in their home to eat cornbread out of a turkey’s ass this Thanksgiving, sources confirmed. “Yes, […]
WESTWOOD — Eager to advertise her technological savvy, UCLA student Jennifer Shaw made sure to highlight her experience with Microsoft’s popular word processor by including nothing […]
WESTWOOD — First year student Carly Lockwood told reporters last Friday that she does not understand how, in nearly two months at UCLA, she has […]
WESTWOOD —The UCLA Department of Administration held a joint ad-hoc meeting last Tuesday with the Center for the Study of Religion (CSR) to discuss plans […]
WESTWOOD — Following her sorority’s “big-little” ceremony, first year Mikayla Montgomery revealed to Enabler reporters that she did not actually feel an immediate sense of […]
WESTWOOD — Late Wednesday evening, third year Electrical Engineering student Devin Thacker reported hearing loud, rhythmic sounds coming from the bed of his roommate, Tanner […]
GENEVA — Since the beginning of Starbucks’ announced “War on Christmas” last week, thousands of red solo cups have left their homeland in fear of […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In keeping with executive tradition, President Barack Obama announced on Oct. 30 that he had authorized the deployment of ground forces in […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Citing Congress’s inability to pass bipartisan legislation, President Barack Obama wrote an unfavorable review of the governing body on Yelp Saturday, giving […]
WESTWOOD — Second-year Natalia Peña had an impromptu meeting with a classmate’s crotch today after she accidentally dropped her pencil between their seats. “The whole […]
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