
Opinion: Final Exams Are Biased Against People With Tiny Bladders And Rectums
Yes, I’m a human. Yes, I pee and poo and shit and even fart. So why is this being held against me when it comes […]
Yes, I’m a human. Yes, I pee and poo and shit and even fart. So why is this being held against me when it comes […]
Dating apps are difficult. Yeah, I said it. “Heyyyyy haha! I also like cats! Lolz!” “WYD” “Taking a shower? Without me?” And I get nothing. […]
GEt it off Get it off! I thINK it BIT ME!!!! All I did was make the squeaky noise so it would look at me, […]
When I first got in the studio, I thought I was set for life. No more MyUCLA, no more Death Stairs to climb, no more […]
I get it. We all love April Fool’s day; we all like to have a little chuckle. We’ve got some reeeaal jokesters among us. But […]
It seemed too good to be true. And I was right. After two dates, the guy from that meet-cute dream encounter gave me his Instagram […]
MANHATTAN — Hey! Yeah, youse over there! I’m walkin’ here! You think you’re so classy in your fancy Toyota whip, huh? Oh, did I scare […]
As the 18th-century Scottish poet Robert Burns once wrote, “the best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” I don’t actually know what that […]
A little birdie told me that people on campus aren’t fulfilling their duty of tipping Mr. GB. After getting a measly 25% raise to $625,000 […]
My fellow youths, we all know by now that our beloved community center is in danger of getting shut down. The question now is what […]
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