Area White Woman Would Totally Date Nonwhite Guy, Just Never Had The Opportunity

LOS ANGELES — Area white woman Tracy Jefferson is completely open to dating a nonwhite man, but has never had the opportunity. “I mean, yes, all of my boyfriends have been white. But it’s not, like, because I only date white guys. I just never happen to meet any available, attractive, interesting nonwhite men,” said Jefferson, who lives in an area which is over fifty percent nonwhite. “I’m not a racist,” Jefferson said, while swiping left on six nonwhite men in a row. “I just haven’t met a nonwhite guy who I really connect to on a romantic level. Why is love so hard in the modern era?” At press time, Jefferson was telling her friends that she couldn’t be a racist, because she thought Idris Elba was totally hot.

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Kushal is a hurricane hitting a Brachiosaurus stuck in rush hour traffic. He is the harmless prank phone call that frightens your mother into moving your entire family eight counties away. He is the smell of freshly baked cookies eerily emanating from an abandoned mental asylum. He is an amazing writer and incredible talent.